Fighting Peter Pan Syndrome

The closer we get to the wedding the more and more I watch every penny I spend. I mean throwing a blow-out party for 350+ people takes a lot of dough. The thing is, as I watch every penny I spend I also start to freak out about any debt that I have. This does wonders for your stress level. Its not that I need to be that worried about the debt or the wedding, I just am. Pile that on top of coming into a job everyday that you are less than thrilled about and it makes for some long work weeks.

I was planning on riding in the BDTT last night, but then got to thinking/worrying about cash. Before I left work I picked up a prescription, bought G some flowers, and grabbed a protein bar. In a matter of seconds I dropped like 50 bucks. If I decided to ride in the TT, it would add another $25 to the total. This would be a little above the $17/day that I budget for myself.

This also got me thinking about all of the time that I spend training and racing which pulls me away from G and my day to day “real life”. I spent all last weekend training, everyday during the week (usually twice) I’m either out on the roads or in the pool, and from here till who knows when all of our weekends are booked with races. So I ended up bagging the race. I got home and surprised G with the flowers and then the three of us went to the dog park. When we got home I went for a quick 30 minute run, and then we had dinner.

Last year some people from Cat6 were thinking about having a ride followed by dinner with our significant others. The idea was to kinda thank them for putting up with our selfishness of being on the bike and away from the house. At the time I thought it seemed kinda stupid. I mean why would we need to thank someone for letting us do something healthy? It’s becoming clearer as I start to grow up. Finding that balance between our time consuming hobby and the really important things in our life is difficult. I think I made the right choice in bagging the race last night. I have so much respect for those of you that have kids in the mix. I guess an end of the year thank you to our support team is the least we can do.